When you’re travelling online there’s a strong chance that you’re going to meet a dudebro or two. Some might throw vitriol at you, others might try to mansplain every reason why you’re wrong, and still others are going to drop in and tell you to mutilate your perfectly natural and oh-so-babeing facial mole just so they can feel better about how much they’ve hurt a woman who doesn’t want to have sex with them.
Courierguy89 thinks he’s being interesting, but he’s actually just a negging douche that needs to run along.
Luckily, you don’t need to pander to their shit. If you’re not as quick on the comeback or just don’t want to engage with assholes on the internet, why not try a few subtle hints in your next DP? With these five makeup looks for facial moles, you can say “I’m not interested in your peen or your beauty advice” and look super cute doing it!
- The ‘darker than your soul’
This look is subtle, but oh so delicious. Use eyeliner to blacken your mole by several million shades. Only once it is darker than night itself must you stop. You’ll feel the power of a hundred witch sisters every time he flinches away from you in terror.
- The ‘fairy specks that rain glitter on boys …to destroy them inside’
Your mole is so bloody bad ass that it can only get better with gratuitous speckles. Use the natural curl of your eyebrows and extend them out with a curling frond of spots. Extend these into a fabulously magical design by incorporating your mole so that nobody can miss how freakin’ sweet it is that you’ve been blessed with it.
- The ‘be a motherfuckin’ mermaid’
What could be better than a strong woman with a unique feature? How about all that AND being a mermaid? Use your eyeshadow palette to explore exciting colour combinations, dust your brows with pure teal magic and finish it off with a matching beauty spot. This look says ‘I will drown unsuspecting sailors in my arms,’ and I love it.
- The ‘invisible girl’
Remember, you can go incognito whenever you bloody well want. You have nothing to prove to anyone, not even other feminists. If your beautiful facial mole is just refusing to accessorise, you want to test out a new look or you just fucking love foundation, this look can be one of your go-tos. Do whatever you want, girl. Embrace your truth.
- The ‘I fucking love my mole’
You love your mole, of course you do. You love it so much you want two of them! And another by your eye, damn it. Oh, and a Monroe-esque beauty spot on your lip. And, you can have them, too! You can have as many facial moles as you want, darling, and all the dudebros on online dating sites can suck it. Use a black eyeliner to add large and small speckles wherever you want- it’s your face and you’re awesome. Rock it!